Nurturing the Spirit of Giving in Our Children and Teens All Year Round

Who better to help us encourage our young children and teens
 than our own friends!  

Nurturing the Little Ones:   On Birthdays Alice told us, "The two grandchildren have lots of toys so for their birthdays  (Sept and Dec) at the parties they have, they ask the children not to bring toys but canned goods which they take to the church food pantry. They get enough presents from family. It has worked out well and they have learned about those less fortunate than themselves." During the Holidays... Sherry gives us other options.  Her family "designated Thanksgiving weekend as the core of their giving tradition.  The kids spent one day organizing all their playthings with the objective of identifying toys and games complete with all their parts and in good condition.  They readied those they no longer used or wanted to give to children who had less than they.  We then took them to an appropriate NGO (don’t recall using that term back then) that distributed holiday gifts to children. Perhaps it was a bribe, perhaps it helped instill a giving spirit, but each child could receive for Christmas no more gifts than the number he gave.  But perhaps I should have given the process more oversight some years.  One year, my older son put the R volume of our Encyclopedia in the gifts box because he thought the children could use the reference material.  Hum … no, he didn’t tell me until it was too late.  And then he added that he put a $10 bill inside the book so the mother could buy herself something.  I often wonder what happened to that book and that money.  But I never wondered at his generosity.  Nor his brother’s."   The spirit of giving is often reinforced by the family's church.  Jo remembers that her church  "always had a special service around the holidays on the spirit of giving. It was a service for children and their parents. Days prior to the service, each child picked a card from the tree that had either boy or girl on the card. At the service the children brought the wrapped gift to the service and placed it under the tree. It was either socks, mittens or something like that for a needy child."  Memories of gift giving as a church tradition can follow a child well into adulthood. As They Grow...During the Holidays and Throughout the Year Another way a parent or grandparent can nurture the spirit of giving is to allot a certain amount of money that the child can spend at a store picking  out toys to give to needy children.  Depending on the age of the child, he or she keeps track of each toy's cost, picking as many toys  within the price boundaries as possible.  Focusing on toys that a child of the same age would like to receive helps to focus the choices. The rule is that no toys can be purchased for the child during this shopping spree.. An even better idea is to have the child hand the toys to the person collecting them for distribution. Dawn relates,"Something we did with Tay from the time he was little happened every year when we went shopping for his school supplies.  We always purchased supplies for a community shelter at the same time: backpacks, school uniforms, crayons, notebooks.  And we took them to the shelter where he would hand them to someone directly.  It was important for him to make the selections and the delivery and to receive the thank you.  As he got older and no longer needed school supplies, we still went shopping for those that did, at his reminder."  Joan H. tells us, "I work at the food bank in our church once a month, and when food is unloaded in the am, different teams from the high school come over to help unload the heavy stuff for distribution in the evening. They also come in the pm from 5-9 and help people cart their food boxes to their car and unload them. Celian Heights ( a center for disabled youths also comes in the morning) with about six of their kids to pack bananas, and oranges in bags. .Some of our people who work in the evening bring their older children along to help distribute.  This involves the high school students, disabled youths, and kids of parents who give their time. I also know some junior-high and senior-high kids that give time at the library.    Wow, the food bank and library are great places for all ages to give time and help.  These student volunteers experience first hand the satisfaction of giving for the benefit of others. Our Own Experiences with Family and Church  Joan D. remembers,"My experience with teaching nurturing was more Eastern European based in the actions I was taught on how to deal with deaths, marriages and emergencies of neighbors and acquaintances.  If my mother or any member of the family heard of a need,  we were expected and encouraged  to start cooking and baking for the one in need and to be available for any or all needs of that person or family." And Elsie tells us, "I was brought up in church. I often thought about the parable of the rich young man who couldn't bear to give up his worldly goods. I guess in my case it sensitized me to the needs of others and the recognition of how absolutely blessed my life has been. Empathy is a quality I would emphasize if I were trying to teach others. The old "walk a mile in his/her shoes" is good, too. Also, I think we need to teach that animals get hungry, often starve, need shelter and kindness, feel pain as people do. . Obviously, our contributors have done a great job of helping children and teens learn the importance of and satisfaction in giving to others.  Want Some Expert Input?  Robin Ganzert, PhD, President of the American Humane Society, discusses the gift of giving in the Nov-Dec, 2013 issue of Grand. Her suggestions are that we start when children are young, and as they grow, to “align your monetary gift with the child's interests (such as pets)." She advised to make a donation in their names and informs us that “Some nonprofits such as the American Humane Society provide downloadable gift cards you can personalize with a message in your grandchild's name.” Those of us who have tried the “gift in the name of” might recommend that the child be pre-teen or older. Penny shares the program under way at Stanford University. "I wanted to share the website with those who are interested in Stanford University's program.  The following website led me to Stanford’s CCARE  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_AGhAP7pzc Thanks to Alice, Sherry, Jo, Dawn, Joan H, Joan D,  Elsie, and Penny for sharing their strategies and memories of nurturing the spirit of giving.